Archive | August, 2012

Here’s A Thing I Would Never Do

28 Aug

File this under “things that blow my mind” – people who wear white to someone else’s wedding.

Hopefully you are as appalled as I am that this actually happens. But you’re probably not, because every single wedding I go to, someone is wearing white – well, two someones, if you count the bride. I went to a wedding this past weekend, and there were TWO other women wearing white dresses. TWO. And one was twenty-something and one was fifty-something, so apparently this faux-pas is ageless.

I just can’t understand how this happens. I realize that there are many etiquette and social rules that not everyone is aware of. And I certainly take many of those rules more seriously than other people. I may be the only person who gets this upset about it (a few months before my wedding I actually had a dream that someone was selling white wedding dresses outside of my wedding reception). And I know that some rules have changed over time. For example, it used to be a rule that you shouldn’t wear white after Labor Day, but that’s not really the case anymore. However, not matter how hard I try, I just cannot fathom a reason for someone to wear white to another woman’s wedding.

Regardless of the fact that this may be an outdated rule, it’s a good one. The bride wears white on her wedding day (well, most brides wear some form of white). The bride should be the star of her own wedding day, and no one should take away from that. Or even remotely risk taking away from that. If you wear the same color as the bride (and you will most likely be the only other person wearing the same color), you are competing with her. Especially if you’re wearing a white, lacy, bridal-looking dress. Even if you’re not, it’s still not okay. It’s also not okay to wear off-white, champagne, ecru, ivory, etc. Not even if it’s not really solid white. If it’s mostly white, it’s off-limits.


I mean, do you really want to do something the Kardashians did? Really?

And while there may be a current trend (which is actually a very old trend) of bridesmaids wearing white (i.e. Pippa and the Kardashians), that’s also totally different – if a bridesmaid wears white, it’s because the bride asked her to. End of story. Period. That does not make it okay for guests to do it.

Oh and also, I’m not alone in this advice. Here’s a quote from (as you know, the foremost wedding planning website):

Black used to be taboo for weddings, but these days a black dress is perfect for evening, just as it is for a night at the opera. Female wedding guests should not wear white — it’s really, really not polite to take away from the bride on her special day by wearing her color. Try to avoid off-white and ivory, too, if at all possible. It’s not as if you don’t own or can’t buy something another color, right?

Read more: How to Be a Great Wedding Guest

So, ladies, if you are headed to a wedding in the near future please do me a huge favor. Go into your closet, ignore the one or two white dresses you own, and pick out ANY of the others. I mean honestly, we all have a dress that is NOT white, am I right? And if you really don’t, then that’s just a good excuse to go shopping.

Does this bother anyone else? Does anyone have an argument for wearing white to a wedding? Anyone else just want to vent (like me)? Do you purposely avoid buying white dresses for the sole reason that you won’t be able to wear them to a wedding, so why own them (like me)?